Don’t look to others to give you happiness. Grow it within yourself and share it with the world around you. Bets are, if you give a bit of your happiness to the world, it will begin a ripple effect, and who knows how many other people you can help. It’s never too late to decide that your happiness (or whatever it is that you want) is yours to create and not the other way around.
We are always inscribing, each action carving our existence in and around the spaces we embody. I cleaned my refrigerator out a couple of weeks ago and was kind of amazed at the story that unraveled in the inanimate. I grow a lot of my own food and purchase the bulk of the rest from local farmers during our growing season. For the rest of the year, we eat what we can preserve and do our best to buy as locally as possible. As I reached beyond the several cabbages I had yet to use (I want to like cabbage, but I just don’t) I was struck by how each of us creates, it’s both deliberate and unintentional. Every act has an effect, even if we don’t mean for it to. The implication of this is profound, meaning that as we move through our lives, changing, growing and making choices, we are always affecting others and the spaces we share with them. We are always writing ourselves down.
Some years ago, I kept hearing about the good/bad apple experiment, wherein one would cut an apple in half and separate it, speaking kindly to one half and unkindly to the other. In each instance, weeks later, the half spoken kindly to was good enough to eat and the other was rotten. We are powerful. Most recently, some friends and I each planted some flower bulbs in clear glass containers, and agreed to meditate on how they grew. Without discussing it, two of us imposed the belief that the three bulbs were symbols of our friendship and the roots reached out for each other until they were connected. The third of us didn’t do this at all and noticed that the bulb that most closely faced her when she would sit in her living room meditating on it was thriving, while the others were growing slower. We are so unbelievably powerful. Think of walking into a room and wanting to just settle in, the feeling so relaxing and inviting. Think of a time when you showed up somewhere and you couldn’t explain it but in every part of yourself all you wanted to do was leave. All examples of inanimate spaces and places inscribed.
And so, what to do of this? I suppose it comes down to intention, being aware, taking responsibility, because we have an effect whether we want to or not. When we come to accept the ripple effect, we recognize that an awareness of our actions, a self-awareness, is an invaluable skill to cultivate. Reflections of yourself are everywhere, even inside your fridge.